717

想独自一个人去我们去过的地方。

但在半路上，我放弃了。

因为我开始控制不到了我的情绪。

到底，是怎样了。

Untitled

Don't know. Don't know what should I do. I know there is something wrong.

Although you never told me, you never wrote to me, I know, and you know about it also.
I know it is some kind of "hiding", is one type of your "self-protecting" that prevent you to drop deeper and deeper.

I don't know what do you want. I don't know why all of it come in such a sudden. Is it any mistake that I have done. I know your feeling is not good, maybe this way can reduce the hurt, or you may feel better in such a way.

Whether you can see this post or not, I just want you to be happy. Promise me, happy always. Smile, and no more tears. I will try also. =)

I thought...

I thought that I can really "see open" already;
I thought I can really accept the fact;
I thought I can really be so "xiao sha";
I thought I can really be so tough;
I thought I can really be so optimistic;
I thought...
I thought...

However, things are not as what I thought.
Maybe, these are just what I thought.
Am I just hide myself from the reality?
I told myself before, don't so easily drop eye tears.

You've bring me back to the reality.
I couldn't control myself and eye tears were dropped last night.

Maybe, I am not that tough as I imagined.

Weird feeling...

She enters my life.

But yet, I don't know what is the feeling actually.

It is quite a confusing one.

Don't know what to do, don't know how to do.

It is such a weird feeling.

Waiting for her? Don't think so much. Just follow the feeling and just depends on fate.

=)

Graduating

Yesterday, the result of my Y4 S3 have been released. As this is my final semester in UTAR, thus release of this result indicates end of my degree life. Ya, I'm not more a student...

The feeling is weird, I've graduated, hardwork for 2years kindergarten + 6years primary school + 5years secondary school + 5years university life are paid off =)

Yet, friends are leaving. Entering the cruel working society soon. Everyone is stepping each other to climb higher. Will there still be true friends in working life? =(

Just back from Phuket 2 days ago. Went there for 5 days 6 nights. Why 5 days 6 nights? this was because we went at night and back at morning. Why so, because only in these times, EVERYONE CAN FLY... other times, the flight ticket was quiteee expensive...

I wished to talk about the trip here actually.. but i think if i reli got to talk abt it, it will surely be a long long long post.. thus, jz forget it.. hehe.. no need to write it here, coz i think the memory there wont be forgotten in my mind forever... anyway, friendship forever! and, UTAR, MY CHOICE...

五年@UTAR - Degree篇

As mentioned in previous blog, miao and i changed our courses to engineering, thus the initial 4 dermaian, had separated into two groups, yiyan and lijong stayed at PJ for actuarial science, me and miao went to setapak. But not long later, before the degree started, miao was asked by his dad to transfer to KDU, Penang, thus left me alone at setapak...

That time Civil Engineering had about 100 students, which were separated into 4 groups. Yizhong and i both were in the same tutorial group, CI G3. The very first day, I got to know Hongzi, as he was sitting beside me, if not mistaken. I still remembered he asked me how many girls in our class, then he left out one of the girl. LOL

The next person I got to know, should be Meimei. That time we were selecting classrep, and her name was the easiest to remember, so I voted for her, not only voted, but shouted to support. Since then, i got more and more friends in my tutorial group.

I still remember, there was one day, blood donation, I followed the friends for my very first blood donation in my life. We were brought there by Koksheng, if not mistaken. Then Ah Khoo was at the bed beside me, and that time should be his first time, I guess, because he even took out his k750 to capture the blood "supplied" by him as a memory. The blood donation was also becoming the topic of very first presentation of mine in degree life, which was about "first blood"...

Throughout these years, especially the beginning 2 years, we one gang of CI G3 used to singK, watch movie, went jusco for lunch, went TBR for lunch, went Genting, Jln Ipoh Bakuteh, etc etc in one group. That's quite enjoyable. However, as time passed, the "member" of this gang kept changing... Some added into this gang, and some left this gang due to some misunderstanding...

Soon, it was my 3rd year in degree. I joined the organizing committee for 2009 May Intake orientation, which opened a new "door" for me to get to know more and more friends in my campus. Ya, i knew quite a lot of friends via the orientation. First, Ken, who was in the same RCM team with me, and became my baobeizhu at last. Then I knew some juniors in ice breaking as well. One of them is Xinqi. Ya, I got to mention her, as she was one of the "main root" for me to get to know others more friends... Then, I joined SRC, joined Traveler's Den committee and also PMP.. let me know more and more friends from different courses and different campus. Especially after UTAR BALL, all of us became much closer...

Thus, throughout the 3rd year of degree, the gang that I mix the most were still the CI G3 gang, and also SRC+gang... (Khenghooi, Ken, Sally, Kimlup, Ban, Meisze, Kelvin, Peiseen..)... Regarding Peiseen, how do I know her? It was due to Xinqi, as mentioned just now. We got to be so friends suddenly in such a short time, it was because of the case of Fiona, I think. Because of one hp num that I accidentally past to someone at canteen, LOL, thus causing me have to treat them drink vitagen and buy pearl milktea as apologize... In this 3rd year, I had my busiest period in UTAR, but yet the most meaningful year, i think... I organized utar ball, festival, orientation, trips to sg lembing and pulau redang in this year, from which I have learned a lot and know a lot of friends... At the end of year3, I joined a camp of YMM, from where I got to know some friends from China... although we have less contact already now... hehe

Soon, Year 4. In this year, because of CityTour, which was not really related to me actually, I got to know 3 more friends. CityTour is an orientation program that brings the freshmen to travel at KL in one day. It was initially organized by Traveler's Den committee and I was asked to incharge of this. But, I have my own Redang trip to organize that time, so I asked my didi aka Peiseen to handle it. Thus, she pulled her coursemates along, Wanjun, Choiyan and Meiyun... In this year, due to resigning the post of SRC, I had more free times. So, I had more time to play futsal with coursemates... which made me become closer with some friends whom I was not that close with them initially... Wenyi, Kakwai, Yeehong, Boonleong, Ah Siong, Kokwei, YY, Yikloong (and Victoria), Season, Joseph, Choongyang, Sintat, Kuekok, Tiongbun, etc etc etc... (too many already...)... We even had formed a team for the mini futsal tournament, namely DREAM TEAM, leaded by Yikloong... The teammates consisted of 7 best futsal players of the year LOL... first and foremost, the captain Yikloong (defender), then the strikers JJ + Tiongbun (or YY?) + Kuekok with the defenders Pingy Ping + YongKiat, and last but not least the keeper Teckwei (me lorr hehehe)...

Other than the futsal gang, there is one new gang that I joined in year4, which erm... ji mui gang? perhaps... consists of the city tour gangs of Geh, Lag, Ju... Yea, since I m Peiseen's jie, "mou la la" I also become jie of them... One of the most unforgettable memory with them was the seremban mamak... and also the long long long dark road without any light... LOL... And because of them, I also got to know their housemates, including Ding, Xi, Bat...

So fast, 6 more days might be my last day in UTAR as a student. Conclusion, although UTAR didn't give me much uni life that I imagined before I entered it, I still enjoy my uni life... It would be my most enjoyable and unforgettable period... I hope that after this, all of us can still keep in touch, although with the primary and secondary school experiences, I knew that it is hard, and it is impossible to get everyone keep in contact. Even if we can still contact, but the relationship between us will be not as closed as now. I don't want to lose any one of you all... I do really appreciate the fate between us... A life is incomplete without friends... So, no matter what happened last time, that made us misunderstood on each other, any "cold war" or etc, forget about all of them...

Last but not least, I LOVE YOU ALL... and DON'T FORGET ME... Next time, if meet me somewhere else, don't just hi and bye, at least find out some coffeeshop and have a chat... Or even if don't meet me, you all will be also welcomed to give me a call, my handphone will on 24 hours for all of you...

(just now at 1U juz met one of my best friends during primary school... whom my friendship with him had became worsen already due to lack of contact since secondary school... i don't hope that it would happen again...)

五年@UTAR - Foundation篇

Initially I planned to write in Chinese, but I lazy... =.="

Well, 9 days later will be my next paper on Wastewater Treatment, which will be also my last paper at UTAR, thereafter UTAR will be only my memory, not more my university.

As mentioned in the title, this blog will summarize my 5-year life at UTAR, from PJ campus to KL campus.

First of all, WHY would I choose UTAR? Is it really UTAR is MY CHOICE? Well, it was a long long long time ago... When I was in Form 5, I still blank of what should I choose for my future career. I don't have any ambition at all, except be a HOTEL TYCOON, and built the very 1st hotel at the MOON =.="""

That time, my 3rd sis, was also choosing for college and courses. Initially, she chose QS at TARC, but after that she changed to UCSI due to scholarship. That time, I started to know about the course of QS, quantity surveying.

Soon, I finished my SPM. Among all subjects I studied, MATHEMATICS and AD MATHS were my favourite, thus I wanted to choose some subject which related to math. I was told that QS was something about calculation only, thus it became one of my choice. Plus, my dad told me before that QS was quite a good choice, suggesting me to take it at UTAR. That time UTAR was still a new university and I heard that UTAR has most of Chinese, then sure a lot of pretty girls those thing, so UTAR became one of my choice. But still, I still look for other institute.

One day we played football, sitting beside the goal there with my schoolmate, Yeoh. He told me that there is one course named WHAT WHAT WHAT Science one, is related to maths, can earn a lot a lot of money, but that course was only offered oversea. Since it was related to maths, and able to earn a lot of money, I started my interest on this course. Few weeks later, perhaps, I heard about the actuarial science, then I knew that the course of WHAT WHAT WHAT Science was actually actuarial science. And, I was also informed that UTAR did started to promote this new course! That's really a good news for me that time. Thus, without any second thought, all four MONEY-EYE dermaian, me, ah miao, yiyan and lijong, decided to go UTAR to study foundation leading to the course of Actuarial Science.

Came to PJ, miao and I stayed at my aunty's house for few weeks before the room we rented get ready. Few weeks later, we moved to PJ sec17, then suddenly Lijong and WeiPei became our housemates and Yiyan became our neighbour. That time, I got to know Kinzai, Limpek, Cheeming, AhSiang, Waikeat, Yichuan who were our housemates from Pahang.


SECTION 17
In PJ, I had learned to yumcha at late night, I had learned to play DOTA... another memory at PJ that I can't forget was... playing gambling with housemates during CNY... (that time said CNY so play till 15th of CNY, then continued to play till the whole month of CNY.... then continued again to play till the end of the semester, which just stopped because we got to move to Setapak already =.=)

UTAR

UTAR = JAIL?

I still remember, the very first day at UTAR, we had to do Chemistry experiment and the report had to be submitted two weeks later. It was an experiment about penetration test, if not mistaken. I started to feel boring, because this did not give me any feel of uni life at UTAR as the first day got to write report already. I remembered that time, I told miao that we wanted to create a legend at UTAR, scored 4.0 or what... LOL

The 1st week at UTAR, since I kept on mixing with miao and yiyan only, thus having no chance to get know new friends. Thus, one day, I be the bad guy, leaving miao alone then tried to get new friends in my tutorial group. I knew I was bad that time, but I had to do so, otherwise both of us would be SOLO the whole year.

That year, I got to know pang, yuanbin, chuanyi, siangwei, siangkuak, alvin loh them, whom I mix the most with throughout my foundation year. I still remembered the moment we sat at the corridor outside PC lab there, scanning for the girls passing by us, and "spannar"? LOL

Although my tutorial group in foundation was not full of lenglui, our TD11 was one of the most famous class among other groups, due to our lovely courserep, who did bring a lawyer to sue the lecturer before, cheated us that the class was canceled and on the another side went to tell the lecturer that we wanted to cancel it, coupled with one of my classmate then broke up with him by passing his love letter around the lecture class...

Soon, semester 3, it was the time that we may change our mind on the course to be taken in our degree. I started to doubt on the future of actuarial science graduate, as I know that the demand in the market was not really high. Even if hired by company, the pay was also around 2000, as the very very high paid was only for those QUALIFIED ACTUARY. My lecturer told me, to get qualified, after graduate, we still have to sit for exam, still need to study everyday after work, which is the life that I don't want to have. Thus, I had made a decision, one of the biggest decision in my life, to CHANGE MY COURSE!

But what course to change? QS, ya... which was one of my choices previously. BUT, I was told by UTAR that UTAR QS was NOT accepting UTAR FOUNDATION STUDENTS, funny right? No choice, have to choose another else. Similarly, miao and siangwei were also influenced by me to change the course, and they changed to electronic engineering.

For me, before entering UTAR, I told myself, if I really choose engineering course, I will only choose E&E. Civil Engineering I heard about it before, but I heard that a lot people study it and it seem to be a course for not-so-good-result students to study. Thus, it was never be in my choices before. Even in my application forms to UTAR (we needed to fill in 5 choices of study), none of them is Civil Engineering.

HOWEVER.... maybe this was due to my last-time ambition of building hotels, or maybe this was because related to QS, or maybe this was because I heard from Yizhong that physics in course was all about forces, like what we studied in Form 4 Physics Chap2, 3 which were my favourite topics in physics that time... which made me at the end.... made another most important choice...

AND, finally, it became my course right now, CIVIL ENGINEERING... =.="

Rabbit Year 2011.

Today, again, I am home alone. Everyone is back to hometown and preparing for CNY. Facebook is fulled of the post of my friends about reaching their hometown and asking for their hometown friends for gathering. Ya, my friends asked me for gathering too. But, I don't join them, as I am still here, at KL.

Yesterday had a dinner with Meisze at Sky Restaurant. The first time the restaurant is so empty during dinner time. Usually this time, wanna find a table also quite difficult. But now, is totally different. No much students around, other customers are all adults or families, except both of us. But Meisze claimed that she is already working, not more student.

This year is the first year I back to hometown on CNY eve, although all my classes in this week are canceled. Alone at home, have nothing to do. Facebook, no much people update already, even MSN also quite quiet.

Two more days is the CNY already, the year of rabbit. Rabbit is my sister's chinese horoscope. But she is not here with us this year, celebrating the CNY with her friends at UK. First time celebrating CNY without her, surely have some weird feeling.

But anyway, tiger year is going to end soon, although I have really no feeling of CNY now. Recall back this whole year of tiger, or year of 2010. It was a "special" year for me. A lot of thing happen, especially at the end of the year. I can't say that it was a good year, but I can't say that it was a bad one, too. In this year, I had joined the organization of the ball night, and everyone seem enjoy it. I had organized the Redang trip to create a sweet memory among friends, especially those who already graduated. I had represented university for the competition and got champion. I had known many new friends and they are all good friends for me. Sounds all are good things happened around me right? I think so, if the thing never happen. However, I believe that everything happen for a reason, challenges is not to get us down, but is to train us and change us to be a better one.

Finally, wish everyone, of course, including me, have a happy chinese new year. Gong Xi Fa Cai, everything go smooth and most important, have a good health.

新年快乐。。。